Read this from marriage.com:

 
Communication Do's and Don'ts

Try these eight tips for navigating the murky waters of communication:

1. Do be honest. Keeping secrets does nothing but frustrate you and perplex your spouse.

2. Do bring up an issue within 24 hours, or forget it. Don't allow a problem to remain hanging.

3. Do keep to the issue. If you start discussing who should
babysit and end up arguing over discipline, you've moved off-track.
Take a break and return to the issue when you're both rational and calm.

4. Don't criticize. You can complain—offer something specific to
the situation. But criticism can involve blame and counterattacks and
is sure to put your spouse on the defensive.

5. Don't make threats. "If you…then I'll…" This puts your
partner on the defensive. Someone on the defensive will never hear
you—which means no change will happen.

6. Don't play the blame game. Really listen to your spouse's
complaints; think them over before you discard them as ludicrous. They
may have a tiny kernel of truth. If so, accept responsibility.

7. Don't make assumptions. You don't know what's going on in
your mate's head. Rather than assuming something that may be a figment
of your imagination, ask.

8. Do say no to the "D" word: divorce. It's amazing how
easily this little word can pop into your head, and worse, your mouth.
This doesn't mean just not using the word; it means not even thinking
the word.